Any way the wind blows is-a fine with me Any way the wind blows, it don't matter to me 'Cause I'm thru with-a fussin' and-a fightin' with-a you I went out and found a woman who is gonna be true She makes me oh so happy now, I'm never ever blue Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows She's my heart and soul and she loves me tenderly Now my story can't be told just how good she is to me Yes, she treats me like she loves me and she never makes me cry I'm gonna stick with her 'till the day I die She's not like you baby, she would never ever lie Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows Now that I am free from the troubles of the past Took me much too long to see that our romance couldn't last I'm gonna go away and leave you standing at the door I'll tell you pretty baby I won't be back no more 'Cause you don't even know what love is for Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows, Any way the wind blows

Hey! Do you know what you are? You're an asshole! An ASSHOLE! Some of you might not agree 'Cause you probably likes a lot of misery But think a while and you will see... Broken hearts are for assholes Broken hearts are for assholes Are you an asshole? Broken hearts are for assholes Are you an asshole too? Whatcha gonna do, 'cause you're an asshole... Maybe you think you're a lonely guy Maybe you think you're too tough to cry So you went to The Grape, Just to give it a try And Dagmar Without a doubt, the ugliest son of a bitch I ever saw in my life Was his name... One Two Three Four! The whiskers sticking out from underneath of his Pancake make-up And yet he was a beautiful lady Nearly drove you insane Let's talk about Leather: LEATHERRRRRR And so you kissed a little sailor Tex Abel, starring in the latest Shepperton Production: Who had just blew in from Spain Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel The story of a demented bread-boffer And acted like it was cocaine Cucumber pud annexed to a fine whole-wheat loaf You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko Then on Tuesday night, Caesar's back in town In a way you can't explain Facing off in a no-holds-barred tag team grudge match With Kona. And so you worked the wall with Michael Three-hundred-seventy-nine pounds of Samoan dynamite Which gave your back an awful strain Volcanic Hell But you came back on Sunday for the gong show Next Thursday, teen town's finest... But you forgot what I was sayin' 'Cause you're an asshole, You're an asshole That's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole Yes, yes You're an asshole, you're an asshole That's right You're an asshole, you're an asshole Now you been to The Grape 'n' you been to The Chest 'N' now I think you know what you are: you're an asshole You say you can't live with what you been through Well, ladies you can be an asshole too You might pretend you ain't got one on the bottom of you, But don't fool yourself girl It's lookin' at you Don't fool yourself girl It's winkin' at you Don't fool yourself girl It's blinkin' at you That's why I say I'm gonna ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Corn hole Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Fist f*ck Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Wrist-watch; Crisco Ram it, ram it, ram it Ram it up yer poop chute Pud! Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up yer poop chute Don't fool yourself, girl It's goin' right up yer poop chute (etc., repeats) Aw, I knew you'd be surprised...

Got no place to go No love left for me to give Why should I pretend I like To roam from door to door I guess that I'll just kill myself I just don't care no more I'm not satisfied Everything I tried I don't like the way Life has been abusing me Who would care if I was gone? Who needs me to care for them? Why should I just sit and watch While the others smile? I just wish that someone cared If I was happy for a while I'm not satisfied (I'm not satisfied) Everything I tried (Everything I tried) I don't like the way (I don't like the way) Life has been abusing me I'm not satisfied (I'm not satisfied) Everything I tried I don't like the way (Everything I tried) Life has been abusing me (I'm not satisfied) I'm not satisfied (Everything I tried) Abusing me . . . (I'm not satisfied) I'm not, I'm not satisfied (Everything I tried) I'm not satisfied (I'm not satisfied) I-I-I . . . (Everything I tried)

I'm a little pimp with my hair gassed back Pair of khaki pants with my shoes shined black Got a little lady walk that street Tellin' all the boys that she can't be beat Twenty dollar bill, I can set you straight Meet me on the corner boy'n don't be late Man in a suit with bow-tie neck Want to buy a grunt with a third party check Standin' onna porch of the Lido Hotel Floozies in the lobby love the way I sell Hot meat Hot rats Hot zits Hot wrists Hot ritz Hot roots Hot soots Hot meat Hot rats Hot chicks Hot zits Hot wrists Hot ritz Hot roots Hot soots

A year ago today Was when you went away But now you come back knockin' on my door And you say you're back to stay, But I say Go cry On somebody else's shoulder I'm somewhat wiser now And one whole year older I sure don't need you now And I don't love you Anymore You cheated me baby, And told some dirty lies about me Fooled around with all those other guys That's why I had to set you free I sure don't need you now And I don't love you Anymore A year ago today You went away And now you come back crying Crying, crying: please, let me in But I don't need you No I don't love you anymore So go lean on...go cry on Somebody else's door Go cry On somebody else's shoulder I'm somewhat wiser now And one whole year older I sure don't need you now And I don't love you Anymore (Oh, my darling!) Go ahead and cry Go ahead and let the tears fall outa your eye Let 'em fall on your dress Who cares if it makes a mess? I gave you my high school ring At the root beer stand We had a teen-age love baby I thought it was sharp It was really so grand...but You cheated me baby And told some dirty lies about me Fooled around with all those other guys That's why I had to get my khakis pressed I sure don't need you now And I don't love you Anymore Baby, I love you so much, darling Why don't you dig me? I dig you But you don't dig me I don't understand what it is I had my car re-upholstered I got my hair processed I got a nice pompadour job on it I bought a new pair of shoes I got some new khakis and I met you And we went out to get a Coca-Cola...

The muffin man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin Research kitchen... reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an Intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and brushing his scapular aside Procceds to dump these inside of his shirt... He turns to us and speaks: "Some people like cupcakes better. I for one care less for them!" Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing Anointment utensil he poots forths a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk Yuk... let's try that again...!) he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosette Near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design. Later he says: "Some people... some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say There is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of god's grey Earth as that prince of foods... the muffin!" Girl you thought he was a man But he was a muffin He hung around till you found That he didn't know nuthin' Girl you thought he was a man But he only was a-puffin' No cries is heard in the night As a result of him stuffin' Bruce fowler on trombone, napoleon murphy brock on tenor sax, and lead vocals, Terry bozzio on drums, tom fowler on bass, denny walley on slide, george duke On keyboards, captain beefheart on vocals, and soprano sax, and madness. thank You very much for coming to the concert tonight. hope you enjoyed it. goodnight Austin, texas, where ever you are.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand? Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand? Well, I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band. I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band. Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt? Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt? I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt. Yes, I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt. Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head? Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head? I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed. I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed. Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck? Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck? I'm goin' to the shrink so he can help me be a nervous wreck... Hey Punk! Punky! Hey Punk! Punk! Hey Punk! (Hey Punk!) Hey Punk! Hey Punk! Punky! (Hey Punk!) Hey-hey! (Hey Punk!) Go man, go... go man, go. ...Soft gun. Golly, do I ever have a lot of soul? Punk, I think I love you! Come on, Roy Questi dominga? Let me see that nose, it didn't... I wanna know for sure! Leave my nose alone please! What are you trying to do? It's him over there Longa! Tic Tac!

Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me He was the playboy type, he smoked a pipe His fav'rite phrase was outta site He had an Irish setter It was a singles bar, a Tuesday night The moon was dim, the band was tight They did the bump together What a splendid sight Her teeth were white (Oo-ah oo-oooh) The drinks were cheap (it was ladies' night) He was glad that he met her She was an office girl (my name is Betty) Her fav'rite group was Hellen Reddy (They discussed the weather) Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a man She was a lonely sort, just a little too short Her jokes were dumb and her fav'rite sport Was hockey (in the winter) He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest Any sport with a puck had to be 'bout the best As he jabbed his elbow in her (get it honey? Get it?) Later on they went off to where the music was soft The candles were drippy, they saw a real hippie Who delivered their dinner The rice was brown, and soon they found That the crowd around that had jammed the room Well it seemed to be getting thinner Honey, honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey, honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a man He took her home to a motor court She would not kiss him, he tried to ignore it But it made him angry Angry. It made me angry Why it made me so angry I could have killed that louse bitch He called her a slut (slut, slut, slut) A pig (pig, pig, pig) And a whore (whore, whore, whore) A bitch (bitch, bitch, bitch) And a cunt (cunt, cunt, cunt) And she slammed the door (the door) In a petulant frenzy A petulant frenzy This is a petulant frenzy I'm petulant And I'm having a frenzy On the sofa she weeps BOO HOO HOO HOO She weeps and she weeps BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO She weeps and she peeps Through the curtain He just got in his car But the battery's dead So he asked to use the phone And she gives him some head And that's the end of the story Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a man like me Honey honey, hey Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a- Baby don't you want a man Baby don't you want a man sometimes?

You know, your mama and your daddy Saying I'm no good to you They call me dirty from the alley Till I don't know what to do I get so tired of sneakin' around Just to get to your back door I crawled past the garbage and Your mama jumped out, screamin' "Don't come back no more" I can't take it My guitar wants to kill your mama My guitar wants to kill your mama My guitar wants to burn your dad I get real mean when it makes me mad Later I tried to call you Your mama told me you weren't there She told me don't bother to call again Unless I cut off all my hair I get so tired of sneakin' around Just to get to your back door I crawled past the garbage and Your mama jumped out, screamin' "Don't come back no more" Later I tried to call you Your mama told me you weren't there She told me don't bother to call again Unless I cut off all my hair I get so tired of sneakin' around Just to get to your back door I crawled past the garbage and Your mama jumped out, screamin' "Don't come back no more" My guitar wants to kill your mama My guitar wants to kill your mama My guitar wants to burn your dad I get real mean when it makes me mad

What's the ugliest Of your body? (Nanana na na na) What's the ugliest (Weeweewoo) of your body? (Naw naw naw naw) Some say your nose (hey) Some say your toes But I think it's your mind